J explains: “I was in my late 20s when I got together with my first husband, and in my mid-40s when we divorced. I knew then I still had time to find a new life for myself. It felt like my old life had come to the end of the road and I knew I needed to move on. I was ready for new adventures and was not afraid to pursue them. Although it took some time and wasn’t always easy, the new life I’ve found is better than I ever expected.”

Being in a bad or neglectful relationship is so hard mentally and emotionally, J knows. “Although the early years had been quite good, by the time we divorced I felt beaten up and defeated. Just having a healthy love makes a world of difference in anyone’s life, and today I am so grateful I am able to experience it. (Read more below.) By the time I separated from my first husband, I had been through the 5 stages of grief for our relationship — and he was indifferent, so there were no big emotions at that point. We mutually tried to divide assets as fairly as possible and just walked away.”

His advice to others: “There are so many lessons for a good relationship. These are basic, but may be taken for granted, especially after several years.”

• Show him love. Tell him, grab him, hug him, kiss him. Daily. Hourly.
• Be a team. Commit to your marriage. Don’t lose sight of what’s important or allow distractions to come between you. All work and no play makes Jack a divorced guy.
• Look forward. Talk about goals, dreams, the future. Chart a course together for the next few years.
• Be nice to each other. Don’t nag or correct, just let him be him. If he screws up, he’s responsible. Bickering sends bad vibes; be positive.
• Enjoy each other. Spend time together, have fun, laugh together, have hot sex. Love is an incredible gift if it is nurtured and appreciated. It’s the best thing this life has to offer.